amsterland

This is going to be stoopid.  Here is my attempt at writing-as-I-go in Amsterdam.

Day 1

13:30 –  So I just made it to my hostel after my first encounter with legal prostitution and public urination.  We have about seven hours to kill before we can check our stuff into the hostel, so here goes nuffin.

21:00 – Those guys down there said all the weirdest stuff and it made complte sense to them and almost no stuff to me.  Barney kinda looked like Horstmann!  And said a lot of retarded stuff, too.  In fact, I bet The Parent Trap was based on them and Barney’s the British one.  Oh and what an amazing game of chess I’ve just had!  I concentrated so hard that I would lose concentration.  I wonder if there are prostitutes for delivery?  Nap-time and then friend Mitch will be here and we will see the world.

Day 2

09:00 – Yesterday = suck-sess.  Success in the sense that I had a great time but suck-sess in the sense that I literally did nothing for about eight hours.  I guess it comes with the territory.  I never woke up from that nap so I figure that must have expended a lot of energy on that chess match.  Time to go eat a hearty breakfast and then junk food all day!

20:00 – That sex museum was amazing.  I know I shouldn’t judge because I know little about them, but I feel like everyone associated with that building is going to hell.  Kyle, Mitch, Katie, Catherine, BAJORSK, and Chow are here now and we’re straight strawberry jamming right now.  Finna be a party tonight.  That guy who was swingin’ for the fences today was amazing.

                Day 3

08:30 – I don’t want to raise kids here.  Not mine, anyway.  No way, no how.

27:30 – Today I saw the Van Gogh Museum, Heineken Experience, and some other very cool things.  Van Gogh was awesome but I really wish I could have seen Starry Night and the flower one.  Heineken was pretty cool but I think it would have been better had I not been spoiled by the Guinness Factory last week.  Tonight I went to Paradiso which was a real funky place.  I watched a whole floor of people dance for a while and I felt strange standing by the side, so I decided to go in and start dancing by myself. I figured that of all places, a former church turned disco-club in Amsterdam was the last place to judge me.  Then, I realized that it’s weird anywhere for guys to dance by themselves.  Goodnight, and good luck.

                Day 4

I’m on my way out of Amsterdam and it was quite the trip.  I’m not sure it was everything I was looking for, but then again, I had no idea what I was looking for.  If I had to do it again, I suppose I would stay for a shorter time…who needs to sit in a coffeeshop for four days?  It was fun and eye-opening but I feel a little burnt out.